One of my favorite teachings of Tony Robbins is that most people have a highway to misery but a dirt-road to happiness.
The teaching here is we have this perfectly paved and quick route to being miserable yet the road to happiness hasn’t been constructed. It’s seen as this state outside of our control we happen to dance in and out of based on our external reality.
We should begin to question why that is?
How can we take control of that.
Life is short and we do have a choice to either to spend it in anger, fear, and filled with hatred or we can begin to seek out how we can be of service, take love as well as give it, and live a life of fulfillment.
Below you’ll find the lessons and quotes taken from me listening to hours of Tony Robbins audio tapes and seminars.
A lot of this stuff you may already heard of if you’re a Tony Robbins fan and seeing and reading it will really serve you well as a reminder.
Here’s 28 of Tony Robbins keys to happiness.
Master Happiness Tony Robbins Quotes:
“You don’t have to have a reason to feel good—you’re alive; you can feel good for no reason at all!”
Here’s a small psychological trick I’ve come across and one you can try:
If you publicly announce to your family and friends that you’re a happy person and you never get angry.
Guess what happens?
You got to live up with that expectation otherwise you’re a liar.
If they question you when you’re mad it can literally snap you out of that pattern or state and make you realize that’s not the ideal way to behave.
Doesn’t always work but we act consistent with who we believe we are and how others view us plays a part in that. Which leads us to the lesson of quote #2.
“human beings – our strongest drive is the need to stay consistent with how we define ourselves.”
Tony in this seminar says, “All of us have kind of an identity for ourselves, a way of defining ourselves, and human beings don’t usually stray far from that. So if you consider yourself to be a conservative person or shy person, I know the way you move to some extent. I know the facial expressions, the gestures, the way you use your body.
That’s a B.S story, b.s meaning belief system.
And if you tell yourself a story long enough, you start to believe it. Once you believe it you act like it.”
“The secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure instead of having pain and pleasure use you.”
“I’ve come to believe that all my past failure and frustration were actually laying the foundation for the understandings that have created the new level of living I now enjoy.”
This reminds me of a question an interviewer asked Kobe Bryant. The question was, “there’s two kind of players. Players who love to win and players who hate to lose, which one are you?”
Kobe Bryant responds “I am neither [silent pause] I play to figure things out. I play to learn something. If you play with the fear of failure or play with the will to win or if that supersedes fear of failure, I think it’s a weakness either way. If you play with fear of failing you’ll play with the pressure – to capitulate to that fear. If you play with the sense of I want to win, what will happen when you don’t? Find common ground in the center and you’ll be unphased by either. That enables you to stay in the moment and stay connected to it and to not feel anything other then what’s in front of you.”
“Whatever you consistently think about and focus upon you move toward.” Tony Robbins
“All your emotions are nothing but biochemical storms in your brain, and you are in control of them at any moment in time. You can feel ecstasy right now, or you can feel pain or depression or overwhelmed — it’s all up to you.” – Tony Robbins
“If you wanted to, couldn’t you get depressed at a moment’s notice? You bet you could, just by focusing on something in your past that was horrible.
If you wanted to feel like you were in ecstasy right now, could you? You could do this just as easily. Could you focus on or remember a time when you were in absolute, total ecstasy? Could you focus on how your body felt? Could you remember it with such vivid detail that you are fully associated to those feeling again? You bet you could.”
“So I wire myself. I’ve got a highway to gratitude, which changes all your emotions. And then I do a three minute process of kind of a prayer for my family and friends. And then I do a three minute process of the top three things I want to accomplish.”
Tony explains this process even further in an interview, “I have this deal with myself called priming. Everyday I say look, you got to have 10 minutes for yourself. If you don’t have 10 minutes you don’t have a life. I’m not going to hope I feel good. What I do is this process, I put some music on, do this massive change in my breathing which radically changes the way I feel.
Then I do this 3-step process, first I do 3 minutes of gratitude and I think of three things I am grateful for and it’s not something up there, I feel it. The reason is when you’re grateful you can’t be worried. You can’t be fearful. When you’re grateful you can’t be angry. And anger and fear are what screw people up the most, in their relationship, life and business. So I wire myself. Most people want to be happy but their habit is to be worried, pissed, or stressed.”
“If we don’t take control of your environment it takes control of us.” – Tony Robbins
“Think about this. Even with all the economic challenges that exist, most people in North America for sure have a better quality of life than ninety-five percent of the planet. Two thirds of the planet is living on two dollars a day. Your worst nightmare is somebody else’s greatest dream, most of the planet’s greatest dream. Your idea of economic downfall is somebody’s dream. That’s the truth.”
“The ultimate resource is resourcefulness. That’s what makes someone successful. And here’s what’s great about resourcefulness. Who has it within them? Who, who? Every human being. The question is whether you access it or not.” – Tony Robbins
“It’s not what we get that makes us happy. It’s who we become, how we live our lives, who we are as a person. People can take away all the things, but who you become, no one can take that away.”
The problem is most of us are trying to be something we’re not. And it isn’t so much about changing yourself. The change happens when you be yourself. Know thyself. That’s the hard part for most people. And then be thyself.
“Success without fulfillment is failure.” – Tony Robbins
“When your life conditions, the way you’re living your life today does not match or doesn’t equal your blueprint, your story of how it’s supposed to be, then you’re going to have disappointment, frustration or pain.”
“But if you generally are meeting what you expect you want from your life in that area, feel good.
Life conditions match, blueprint, feel good.
So what makes you feel bad? What creates pain, stress, frustration?
Real easy way to figure it out. Answer this question, what’s an area of your life you’re not happy with? Be honest with yourself. And even if your life is great all kinds of ways, I’m sure there’s an area you’d like to improve. Anybody who’s honest if they’re doing great in their career, very often don’t take care of their body so much. If they’re really focused on their body. You know, very often they find themselves in a position where they’re not spending enough time with their kids, or if they’re spending time with their kids, their intimate relationships, not doing so well.
This is because it’s the nature of human beings to focus on areas they feel comfortable with and strong in and give those time. And the areas they don’t feel so strong and they go, I don’t have time for it, but what they’re really saying is I don’t feel very competent in that area.”
“If you’re suffering, if you’re in pain, if your life doesn’t match how you think it should be and you think you’re helpless to change it.” – Tony Robbins
“Now you have only three choices.
Choice one, blame something, an event, someone else or yourself. As we talked about earlier in the series, blame games just destroy you. There’s no progress when you blame for the moment you feel okay, but nothing changes. What are your real choices?
You only have two choices in life. If life doesn’t match your blueprint, you either have to change your life. That is, you got to say, you know what, my body isn’t there. I’m going to go work out. My relationship isn’t there. I’m going to change it. You know, I’m not making what I gotta make I’m going to retool. I’m going to get a new skill. I’m going to go back to school. I’m going to start a business. I’m going to do something. You have to do something to change your life.
Or in order for you to be happy, if you can’t change your life, you’re going to have to change your blueprint. Usually in life, it requires a little bit of each. Does that make sense? And if you change your take, change your life and change your blueprint, you can have an extraordinary life.”
“I don’t want challenges, but if they’re here, I know I can handle them. That strength of spirit is what creates a sense of freedom and joy in life.”
“The purpose of a goal is not to get the goal. The purpose of a goal is who we become to achieve it. What you get will never make you happy, who you become will make you very happy or very sad, depending upon how you approach it and what you do with your life.” – Tony Robbins
“Celebration is the secret to joy. Joy in a relationship is the basis of anything.” – Tony Robbins
“This is the weird thing about human beings, what happens when a local sports team wins a national championship. Isn’t it weird culturally that we’re going to make our happiness tied to someone else’s performance that we can’t control just based on living in a city.
But at least the city goes crazy for that one day.
So realize you don’t need an excuse to feel good. How many got more than enough reasons to be happy and grateful for your life? For your health? The people you love. So all you got to do is retrain your body to celebrate instead of training yourself to fit in.”
“People will give up their goals and dreams to meet their needs.” – Tony Robbins
“You can get certainty by lowering your expectations, saying nothing ever works. Nothing ever will. Everybody screws things up. You’ll lose your dream. People will give up their goals and dreams, they’ll even give up their own values to meet their needs.
The only question in life is not whether you’re going to meet your needs. The only question is how.”
“If you want to change your life, you’ve got to change your questions.” – Tony Robbins
“The most important decision of your life is deciding you will be happy no matter what.”
“The only thing we can control is what we think about what we focus on, what we feel and what we experience. The most important decision of your life is deciding you will be happy no matter what. Because unless you do that, you won’t be.
And I can tell you, achievement is common, happiness that is sustained is not. You want to be achiever, here should be your new goal to achieve the highest level of daily happiness that any human has ever experienced, because if you do that, you’ll be the ultimate achiever. You’ll dwarf everyone else and you’ll achieve as well.”
“So if you put yourself in a position where life has to be a certain way based on your blueprint for you to be happy. And life not only isn’t that way, but can’t be that way, then you’re going to be unhappy and miserable forever.” – Tony Robbins
Sometimes you can’t control what’s happening with your own body. I mean, every one of us is going to age and certain things eventually change. Right. It’s just how it works. So if you put yourself in a position where life has to be a certain way based on your blueprint for you to be happy and life not only isn’t that way, but can’t be that way, then you’re going to be unhappy and miserable forever.
See if in order for you to be happy, your parents have to be alive in my case. That was a belief I once had and I was into challenging traditional therapists as opposed to training them. I was a young kid and I just cared about people, I wanted to show what was possible. I thought challenging was the way to prove myself and it was a good way of doing things.
You have to understand how powerful the blueprint is and that sometimes you’ve got to change it, not just change your life in order to be successful, fulfilled, happy, and have meaning. But what you got to do is find out why is that blueprint that way? What’s the need you’re after?
“Most people want to be happy, but their habit is to be worried or pissed off or frustrated or stressed. And so there they’ve got a highway to stress and they got a dirt road to happiness.”
“Change your perception of what something means or change your actions. That’s what it takes and you’ll change the way you feel and heartbeat.” – Tony Robbins
“What you look for, you’ll find. When you decide you can’t find something, you’ll also discover you won’t find it.”
“Leadership is the capacity to disappoint your disappointment because you’re going to have to go through failures.”
“I never went back to that place of being angry at somebody else who had more or blaming other people.
What they got, what they did, fairly or unfairly. Who the hell am I to say? What I want to do is focus instead on being a blessing in people’s lives.
That if I could find a way, every day, to do something, to add more value for other people, then I wouldn’t have to worry about anything.
Just like you don’t worry about taking a breath or whether oxygen is going to be there. You don’t ask the question. You know it’s going to be there.
I figured if I lived my life that way, I spontaneously did was right consistently. I wouldn’t have to worry. And I haven’t another day since. That doesn’t mean I have stressful times, but I haven’t gone back to that place of scarcity.”
“Progress equals happiness. Even if you’re not where you want to be yet. If you’re on the road, if you’re improving, if you’re making progress, you’re gonna love it. You’re gonna feel alive.” – Tony Robbins
“I can tell you the secret to happiness in one word: progress.”
In a tweet “Want to know THE SECRET to HAPPINESS? I’ll give it to you in one word… PROGRESS. And the reason is: LIFE is GROWTH!” – Tony Robbins
“The happiest people don’t have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything.” – Tony Robbins